It's a Boy!!!

Wayne and I went in for the ultrasound on Thursday, and it was clear as day--our baby bean is a boy!  After resigning himself as a father of three girls, and all of whom would be crazy and loud like me, Wayne was excited, and even a little surprised, by the news.  A BOY!  And now I'm the nervous one... I have no idea what to do with boys!

I'm sure I'll learn, though... or so I hope.  I will love him despite all the extra messes I already foresee...  the little boy obsession with wrestling and blowing things up (that may not solely be confined to little boys)... and the extra energy and rambunctiousness I've witnessed in so many a Sunday School terror.

That's what Wayne and I have been learning about lately--love.

Last week, we found out some scary news, that our baby has a 1 in 21 chance of having Down Syndrome (most women my age carry the risk of only 1 in 500).  While this means that our baby is more than 95% going to be normal, the results are still alarming, and we were scheduled a level 2 genetics ultrasound right away with the option of having an amniocentesis performed that day.  With the ultrasound, the doctor would be able to inspect its organs and measure the baby's bones for signs of normal development, but it is the amniocentesis, a procedure in which they extract amniotic fluid from my uterus, that provides conclusive results as to whether our child has Down Syndrome or not.  The downside to the amnio, though, is that it does carry with it a slight risk of miscarriage. 

Wayne and I went back and forth concerning the amnio.  While we REALLY want to know if our baby has Downs or not, we wrestled with whether that was enough of a reason to subject our baby to any risk of harm, even if it was just a slight risk.  After a lot of deliberating, talking with others, and prayer, we decided not to proceed with the amnio.  In the end, our worst case scenario wouldn't be waiting five months to find out our baby has Downs, but to lose the baby unnecessarily through the process.

We went into the ultrasound with peace of mind and heart, and seeing our baby on that monitor... it was magical.  We got to see his spinal cord, femur, brain, his little fingers and toes, all four chambers of his heart beating healthily, the tiny valves that provide him with oxygen right now but will close once he meets the world...  And we learned our little baby is a boy, which makes it all that much more real.  The doctor said that our son's bone structure looks good--no signs of Downs--which is a relief.

We are continuing to pray.  And not just for a normal baby, but for our own hearts as well.  Through this process, we realized just how many expectations we already had for our baby... we wanted him to be smart and athletic... and if he played an instrument or two, that wouldn't hurt.  Now, we're just praying for his health and that he loves the Lord... and that we will be parents who will support, nurture, and veer him towards Christ.  We need to keep everything, including our children, in our open palms, as nothing is ours, but the Lord's.  This is a lesson in letting go, before our baby has even arrived.  And it's a lesson in loving and accepting our child, our son, no matter what. 

"The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD" (Job 1:21).